Very Terrible Experience

Sorry for posting so much negative events in my blog recently. Just leave if you don't like it.

This happened on the day one of my major assignments due.
I was spending like 3 weeks to do this important assignment. 3 weeks!! I seldom start my assignment 3 weeks before it due. Whether I fail or pass this unit all depends on this assignment. It worth 50% of the average mark for this unit. Counseling and Psychotherapy theories and Practice is a unit that I never touch before. I never done the prerequisite for this unit. I was totally blank during the first few weeks of the lectures and tutorials. I don't understand what is psychotherapy, I don't understand any of the terms that the lecturer use, I don't know what is counseling, I don't know how to counsel people... Did I tell you that I'm the one and only Asian in my tutorial? I have no friends in my tut. I'm alone. Most of the students in my tut are psychology students. They are smart and they know so much more than the Nutrition and Dietetics students. We are required to talk a lot and expressed our opinions for the activities. We have to practise in groups as a counselor or a client or an observer. We have to demonstrate a counseling session in the major assignment. Counseling tut is the most stressful tut ever. I'm scared and I'm always giggling. I seldom express my opinion and keep quiet all the time. I never give up anyway. I always take it as a challenge rather than a barrier to learn. My biggest fear is speaking/sharing story with random people. I'm happy that I could do it better and better each week. I worked harder, I tried to absorb and learn the counseling skills and I even get my friends to practice together. I could say it bravely that I never skip any of the counseling tut even I have an exam on that day.

Because of this assignment, I spent so much time to film the counseling session. I felt extremely bad that I wasted so much of my client's time and he still so keen to help! A big big thank you for you and sorry. Because of this assignment, I've seen a counselor before. I actually talked about something private with her and observed her counseling skills at the same time. Because of this assignment, I forfeited my time on doing research and rarely studied for my mid-sem exam, which was 3 days before this assignment due. Because of this assignment, I did not sleep for at least 2 days! I look 10 years older now! Because of this assignment, I made my first step to make an appointment with the learning adviser. The story begin here!

Well, I haven't slept for 2 days! My assignment due on friday 9pm and I booked the 9am appointment on Thursday. I slept at 7am and accidentally overslept. When I arrived the adviser's room, I sincerely apologise to her but how she responded to me was rude. I haven't had my assignment done so didn't get to print it out before seeing the adviser and I just carried my lappy all the way to uni on my tired body. When I just met the adviser, she was like "I need you to understand that my job is to help students in their assignments and I won't be typing in your computer." Yes I do understand that. It was my first time to be there so she required some of my info. She was asking me what unit I'm doing and I said PYB208. I told her that I'm not sure about the name of the unit, it's something come with counseling theory and practice. She was like freaked out that I don't remember the unit name I'm doing. WTH??!!! It's not surprised at all. Who the hell will remember the freaking long and complicated name of the unit? At least I remember the unit code (the most important thing). I think it was a misunderstanding. I think she supposed to ask me about my course rather than the unit. 'Coz she did mention something about that was her first time seeing a psychology student towards the end of the session. After getting the personal information, she was like "Why are you late? Do you know how many students need this appointment... bla bla bla bla bla.. " Well, I explained to her honestly. Get back to the assignment. She didn't help at all. She was like wasting time picking out the typing error in the criteria sheet and pulling out all those fucking comments irrelevant to the assignment. Is typing error a big matter?? I don't think she never have typing error before man!! Shut up!! She then asked me to show her the question sheet. I showed her the question sheet that we printed out in week one and explained to her that we were not doing what was required in that sheet anymore, everything was changed and based on the new criteria sheet and we didn't have a new proper question sheet. She started argue with me again that the question sheet was written 2010, assignment due date 24th september 2010.... the question required us to write critique not theory & argument..... and then asked me to be clear what is question sheet and what is criteria sheet and told me she is there to help u to break the questions not about getting high score bla bla bla bla bla... Hello, don't you understand what I said???? the lecturer changed his requirement!!! we have to follow the new criteria not the ancient old question sheet!! She still showing me the date written on the old question sheet and asked me to be clear of what she said. I'm speechless. I'm a person who don't like to argue with people. I already have enough stressed and I finally broke down at the end of the session. I was emo till the max! I just can't control my emo and my tears anymore.. Before I left, she said to me "you will pass." I replied "yup". She said again "I mean your feeling. It doesn't mean you will pass your assignment." This is fucking rude man!!! 欠扁到暴!!!! seriously feel like slapping her when I think back now!!! I can't believe that I still can be so polite to her "Thanks for your help"!!! SHIT
Ok, this is really not ok!! She screwed my emotion, she screwed my confident, she screwed my life!!! I was FML till the max!!! I ran to a friend's house from uni with uncontrollable tears flowing down my cheeks.. Never feel that shame before. It's like what I did for my assignment is not appreciated and graded as fail. WTF!!!! My mood totally spoiled and no heart to continue to work for that assignment. I ended up writing sufficient words with some irrelevant points and submitted it. I never feel that bad when I submit my assignment. She might be right. I will fail my assignment! What she said to me seriously affect my emotion. Even now when I think back. It's really hurt. I'm seriously unmotivated to work on any of my assignment.

Ok, please don't ever mention about this bitch in front of me again! Not even the "great time" I had her to devalue my works and personality!! I seriously will get cranky and rude!!

That's all!! Bye